My new buddy is Klaus. He’s this German guy who runs some special group in Europe that thinks they should rule the world, cull the human species and control the ones that live. Here he is giving me the sacred scroll of membership into the new world order.

He’s teaching me how to speak to the group at the next meeting.

His lessons included many lectures on being from a superior race. and what I needed to do to be more equal. He said, “Now I voult employ zese methots viss some jutchment. Ess you ken see, using zem all ze time vill make zings difficulz. So use zem sparingly ent inconsistently, vich iss exectly vat a foreign speaker vill do in ree-elity anyvay.”

I answered “Understood!… ahhh  I mean verstnden!

Go especially easy on ze final devoicing. Also, pleasse be avare zet ze eccent depicted zuss voult be a very extreme German accent, vich iss becoming rarer and rarer zese dayss.

Again, I answered “Ja, mein Herr”

Klaus added, “And you will eat zee bugs, you vill own nodtink and you’v vill like it!”

I mumbled, “Yawohl“.