With the new technologies to hit the consumer market, it’s not as tough as the scientists and officials claim to see the difference between real or fake meat. “Don’t believe your lying eyes!” some have said. “You won’t tell the difference.” Please focus on the picture. Tell me you don’t see that is not me, […]
Google Bans 90% of Chainsaw Chicken Site
Our web professionals here at Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd have been diving deep into why so many can not enjoy our feature site. Well, after careful, rigorous examination of our meta data and statistical analysis, we have found that Google has purposely blocked, non-indexed or excluded over 90% of ChainsawChicken.com “Non-sense”, expounded Chainsaw. “We’ve been […]
We Need More Eggs
With the price doubling and tripling on eggs, Chainsaw Chicken knows a business opportunity when he see it! It’s just like what Rahm Emanuel said… “Never let a crisis go to waste”. Because of this opportunity, Chainsaw has taken to the coop, along with the other chickens, to generate eggs for the willing consumers. “I […]
Strange Bedfellows
Strange Bedfellows? Could be… Rumors swirl that the FTX Corp team all lived together in a ‘poly’ relationship with each other. Sam Bankman-Fried is said to recruit guests to join the dynamics of their group. Here we see Chainsaw evidently being welcomed into the fold. No news of Representative Water’s status within the group. Some […]
My FTX Tragedy
I’ve been trying to call and text FTX Chief Executive Sam Bankman-Fried all day. I get nothing! No call backs or replying text. I want to know what to do! With the news that FTX has failed and filed for protection from the courts and that Sammy-boy is in trouble with the authorities, I needed […]
Tyson Exec Sleepwalking
The chief financial officer of Tyson Chicken was arrested in Arkansas over the weekend after he entered a random woman’s home while intoxicated and fell asleep in her bed, according to police. The CFO, was found asleep at the home in Fayetteville on Sunday at 2:05 a.m., according to the preliminary arrest report. Tyson’s headquarters […]
New A.I. Competitor
The new money making idea in the corporate world is artificial intelligence. Called A.I. The usual names we all think of have been investing Billions into this technology. All in the hopes to come out ahead of the rest of the pack to get the ‘big bucks’. Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd has jumped into the […]
‘Chicken Magazine’ Cover
Now, Chainsaw Chicken has joined the ranks of Christie Brinkley, Chrissy Teigen, Farrah Fawcett and Alfred E. Newman as successful magazine cover models. Check the news stands for this months issue of ‘Chickens Magazine’. There you will find Chainsaw enjoying a plate full of morning fresh eggs. From this exposure big things have been happening. […]
Priceless Chicken Troll Doll
You might own one of these priceless Chainsaw Chicken Troll Dolls and not be aware. Check that junk drawer. Go threw that pile of stored stuff in your mothers attic. Search the shelves of Goodwill and tables at swap meets. Dedicate your Saturdays to going to all the garage sales where you live. But why […]
Patient Zero Monkeypox
The World Health Organization believes they have identified the primary vector showing patient zero with monkeypox in the latest outbreak. Sergey ‘Serg’ Chicken is seen here with his long time companion monkey named ‘Cheesecake’ standing in front of the original headquarters of Google. At that time, Google was a struggling vegetable and fruit store with […]
Chicken & Real Star Soup
Campbell’s Soup has selected Chainsaw Chicken to be the new label icon for the longtime favorite product “Chicken & Stars”. “I’m simply the best spokes person they could ever find” said Chainsaw. “I’m a chicken and I am a REAL star”. No one can debate either point!” The soup executives could not agree more. They […]
Chainsaw Gets 33rd Degree
In a surprise ceremony at Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd, Chainsaw was so astonished to learn that he had been awarded the honors of a 33rd Degree Freemason of the Scottish Rite. With that, comes membership in the Illuminati as well as New World Order using Build Back Better. Who would have known that the lunch […]
Financial Yacht Party
My Uncle, Hunter Chicken, was commissioned to bring his 75 meter yacht to the coastal area of Delaware for those ‘hanger-ons’ and “unofficial” foreign government representatives of the current administration to party with the son of the ‘big guy’. There the twins from Ukraine, Mushi and Pushi. There’s Shemi from Uzbekistan and there’s Miss Columbia’s […]
Nun for me!
Henrietta Pluck was always the kind of girl that seemed to be a trouble magnet. In middle school she was involved in a money scandal when she ran the student store and was accused of skimming alittle something off everything she sold. Suddenly, a 5 cent pencil was a quarter. College rule notebook paper doubled […]
Genocide Games Zamboni
Have you been watching the Genocide Olympic Games from Beijing? Have you noticed how smooth and flawless the ice is? After all those skaters from hockey or ice dancing cutting grooves it can be pretty tricky for the competitors. They don’t show it much on the coverage but you should know that it’s Chainsaw Chicken […]
New Mandate to Obey!
“Hello and thank you all for attending this zoom corporate call transmitted world wide to all the Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd, facilities, branch offices, remote locations and those of you who are working from home” said Chainsaw. “As the CEO and President of Chainsaw Chicken International and having well over 100 employees, we are subject […]
Ombudsman Statement
“Let me introduce myself. My name is Theodor T. Turkey. You can call me Tom,… Tom Turkey. I am the required Ombudsman appointed by the Internet Counsel of Blogging Standards. Yes… We call it I.C.B.S. while some refer to us as I see Bull S*it.” “The typical duties of an ombudsman are to investigate complaints […]
500th Posting
That’s right folks! This is the 500th posting on our site. These 500 postings go all the way back to 2015. Back then, we used to post short captions like you would see on a comics page in the paper but I decided to gravitate to a long format in order to allow more of […]
New Psychic Network
I’m sure you’ve seen the billboards and late night TV commercials for the New Psychic Network. Chainsaw launched a new enterprise this year because of all the unpredictable things happening to everyone. Now, you can give Chainsaw a visit to put those important matters to rest. You can walk away confidently knowing you have all […]
Crossing State Lines
He’s crossing State lines! Yes! Chainsaw is crossing State lines! Quick! Call the alphabet media! You have trouble watching any news broadcast that doesn’t seem to include that line. Especially when it’s about something linked to an opposing political point of view. But as Chainsaw points out, what if we applied this standard to other […]