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Time-Travel Success

Time-Travel Success

Rosco Chicken turned to his younger cousin Waldo Chickadee in order to synchronize the simultaneous launch of their science project. When both operators pushed their buttons, a flash of color filled the air. They later called this “The Pepto Bismol Blast” with it’s bright pink blast of energy. Waldo and Rosco had made this discovery […]

“Looking at Uranus” Closes

“Looking at Uranus” Closes

“Looking at Uranus”, is a Broadway play based the life of Astronomer William ‘Eggs’ Herschel, who discovered the planet Uranus in 1781. There was  much anticipation for the opening of this period piece musical. In the light of the success of ‘Hamilton’, it seemed justified. While the major players were generally unknown, Chainsaw Chicken was […]

Trans Antarctic Tour Stalled

Trans Antarctic Tour Stalled

You may have seen this on the evening news but here is an update.  The ‘Trans Antarctic Tour’ has run into some difficulty on it trek to visit the many manned weather stations in the antarctic. “It seems that our driver ran across an ice crevasse stranding the tracked snow vehicle in a precarious position” […]

Wedded Bliss

Wedded Bliss

The day finally arrived. Where you in attendance? It was the blessed wedding of Scooter and Skippy. They are cousins of mine from opposite sides of the family. They met at a family birthday for Grandma ‘Bubbles’ Chicken and were instantly attracted to each other. So much so that twice they were told to “knock […]

New Covid Theory

New Covid Theory

A new Covid theory has surfaced laying blame for the world-wide pandemic being purposely caused by aliens from outer space. This report, not carried by any of the major news networks, claims that in 2019 an alien space craft landed outside of Wuhan, China. The aliens abducted a resident of the area and kept him […]

New Mandate to Obey!

New Mandate to Obey!

“Hello and thank you all for attending this zoom corporate call transmitted world wide to all the Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd, facilities, branch offices, remote locations and those of you who are working from home” said Chainsaw. “As the CEO and President of Chainsaw Chicken International and having well over 100 employees, we are subject […]

psycho-anal-ass

psycho-anal-ass

My doctor suggested that we try a new style of mental therapy. I believe he said it is something like ‘psycho-anal-ass’. Never heard of it before. Sounds like there will be some very personal discussion. I remember that Alfred Hichcock movie ‘Psycho’. Creepy movie, for sure. But I don’t have my mother sitting in a […]

He’s a Quack!

He’s a Quack!

“Good morning… Mr…uhhh… Chicken. What brings you in today?” questioned the ‘on call’ doctor . “Well Doc,” Chainsaw began to speak as he rested on the paper covered exam table. “It’s like this. For the last several days I have been feeling like my gizzard in out of whack. It’s not working as it should.” […]

Pre-Havana Syndrome

Pre-Havana Syndrome

Chainsaw was suffering from a typical headache. He had them most of his life. As he leaned back in his easy chair and tried to relax, his thoughts went back to that old black and white T.V. commercial for Anacin Aspirin. He remembered watching them as a kid always seeing it while watching “Voyage to […]

Biden Medical Video Leaked

Biden Medical Video Leaked

In a unexpected mysterious event, President Joe Biden’s Colonoscopy video was leaked today. Rumor has it that it this my have come from the Vice President’s office in retaliation to the negative press leaked to CNN regarding the feud between the two office holders may be having. While recording the video procedure is nothing new, […]

The transcendental chicken

The transcendental chicken

♫ Hare Krishna ♫ Hare Krishna ♫ Krishna, Krishna ♫ Hare Hare… ‘Ching’ sounded the finger cymbals at the end of the chant. Mahavishnu Chicken closed his eyes, breathed in the incense smoke of sandalwood and chanted  “Gunga galunga… Gunga, gunga-galunga”. ‘Ching-Ching” again chimed the cymbals. Mahavishnu Chicken continued to chant with expectations of connecting […]

New Emoji

New Emoji

Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd had their emoji submitted and then rejected. This was the third time. Now it took a legal suit to get Apple, Inc to finally agree to accept this submission. What changed their minds? It was simple. Chainsaw obtained a copy of the submission request put forth by the socialist agency that […]

The Girls Showers

The Girls Showers

With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]

Wuhan Lab Discovery

Wuhan Lab Discovery

Guest scientist Fauci Chicken has been working non-stop for months at the Wuhan Labs, in order to try to avoid the similarities of the issues with Merek’s Disease and Covid-19. Here is what Wikipediphile says about Merek’s Disease in chickens: (look for yourself under ‘Prevention’ at the link below) “Because vaccination does not prevent infection […]

Machu Picchu Lawn Service

Machu Picchu Lawn Service

Isn’t Machu Picchu beautiful? The stone and grass make such a pleasing image. But you might be asking, “Grass? At 8,000 feet above sea-level? How curious. That must take a real professional yard service to keep it all looking so neat and trimmed with such color”. Let me introduce to you how these patches of […]

First Electric Cargo Ship

First Electric Cargo Ship

News arrived that great Uncle Henry Morgan Chicken has been selected to skipper the first, all electric cargo ship. When asked about this privilege, Captain Henry simply said “Arrrrrr, Supposed to be a great honorrrrr!” his Nantucket accent in full display. The interview continued, “So how long have you been a ships captain? Henry answered […]

Mech-Chicken 2021

Mech-Chicken 2021

Chainsaw Chicken was happy to take possession of a new prototype Artificial Intelligence equipped robot from MIT. The A.I. department has dubbed it “Mech-Chicken”. Mrs. Chicken, was visibly pleased saying, “Oh my word:. Do I have plans for you!”     Transhumanism for me!