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Tribute Toy

Tribute Toy

If you remember Black and White television, the Beatles visiting New York City or ‘Leave it to Beaver’ on TV, you probably remember the Dipping Bird. Now, back by popular demand, Ronco with K-tel records and Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd is offering a commemorative tribute replica for sale. Granted, we’ve made a few changes. Most […]

The Girls Showers

The Girls Showers

With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]

Wuhan Lab Discovery

Wuhan Lab Discovery

Guest scientist Fauci Chicken has been working non-stop for months at the Wuhan Labs, in order to try to avoid the similarities of the issues with Merek’s Disease and Covid-19. Here is what Wikipediphile says about Merek’s Disease in chickens: (look for yourself under ‘Prevention’ at the link below) “Because vaccination does not prevent infection […]

Chicken who?

Chicken who?

“Hello there! How ya doing? Are your enjoying this county fair?” Chainsaw asked as he worked his way through the poultry exhibits. No answer came from the red chicken he was addressing. “I’m a sponsor of this area of the exhibit. That’s my logo behind you and you can see my web site address plastered […]

Smiling Assassin

Smiling Assassin

Tragedy reared it’s ugly head in our home this week. When Mrs. Chicken and I returned from the gala at the Met, we found Rodney, our neighbor. He likes, ahhh…(pause) ‘liked’ to dress as if he was a member of our family. He was watching the summer finale of America’s Got Talent at our place […]

Machu Picchu Lawn Service

Machu Picchu Lawn Service

Isn’t Machu Picchu beautiful? The stone and grass make such a pleasing image. But you might be asking, “Grass? At 8,000 feet above sea-level? How curious. That must take a real professional yard service to keep it all looking so neat and trimmed with such color”. Let me introduce to you how these patches of […]

Biden Adjustments

Biden Adjustments

Darth Chicken has returned to the Oval Office to make some adjustments and fine tuning. “Just a small adjustment with this tiny dial… THERE! Now! That should shorten the lag time between questions and answers… Okay, now for the sleepiness during the day. I am turning up the alertness throttle stop. Almost there… ahhhh…DONE! Now…I […]

Get your FAKE chicken!

Get your FAKE chicken!

Fake Chicken? Yes… Chicken made from plant protein. MMmm mm Good! It’s so good, Chainsaw has dedicated all his free time to promote the alternative of using fake chicken rather than slaughtering his family members. ” We have to do something about the systematic extermination of all those that look like me. Next we have […]

Treasure Found

Treasure Found

  What a good find!  I have been looking for this 45 since 1963. It’s called “Chicken Feed” performed by ‘Bent Fabric and his piano’. Now you say, “who’s that???”  Some will remember his hit “Alley Cat“, a tune that may be more familiar by hearing than knowing the title. ‘Chicken Feed’ is a record […]

First Electric Cargo Ship

First Electric Cargo Ship

News arrived that great Uncle Henry Morgan Chicken has been selected to skipper the first, all electric cargo ship. When asked about this privilege, Captain Henry simply said “Arrrrrr, Supposed to be a great honorrrrr!” his Nantucket accent in full display. The interview continued, “So how long have you been a ships captain? Henry answered […]

New Mustache

New Mustache

The other day I was digging around in my underwear drawer trying to find a special pair I had for anniversary and birthday occasions. I kept pulling the drawer out further and further, but hey were gone. One can only speculate as to where they ended up. However, I did find something I had completely […]

String Puller Identified

String Puller Identified

An accidental image was captured on a closed circuit secure broadcast to other figure-heads and supposed leaders within the New World Order. There, to those who were able to see the secret image witness, was the answer that so many people who ask the question. “Who is really pulling the strings behind Biden”? When the […]

New “Woke Wash”

New “Woke Wash”

Have you noticed a sudden decrease in your social woke-ism? Have others noticed your lack of being sufficiently woke, as well? Do you know someone, such as your spouse, parent or neighbor that are secretly conservatives or even members of that evil political party here in the USA, that really needs to be ‘immersed’ in […]

Successful Dating

Successful Dating

Dating can be very tricky now days. I see the very high frustration level on the other men’s faces, siting alone as I am in the back corner booth with my posse. While others worry about swipe right or left with online dating, I have learned what really works and keeps the ladies coming back, […]

Ghani hides in our home

Ghani hides in our home

“A warm welcome to you Mr. Ghani”,  Mrs. Chicken said to the ex-president of Afghanistan as he exited his limo. “Salam alaikum” Chainsaw  proclaimed, sweeping his palm to his chest and bowing some. Ghani swooped past Chainsaw, checking over his shoulder left and right. He asks, “Any press around here? I have been trying to […]