“Look at the studio Chainsaw is building. Why would he need all this? Who’s he planning to talk to…?”
Good question. Even the techs don’t know. Every time one asks, Chainsaw just stares into the camera test pattern and whispers, “Soon.”
The studio hums with LED panels, mixers, and broadcast gear that looks like it fell off a CIA truck. There’s even a button labeled ‘Reality Feed’—which no one’s dared to push since the coffee maker started bleeding static.
Rumor is, Chainsaw’s working on something interactive. Something that answers back. Something called Ask Chainsaw.
According to insiders (meaning Gonzo and a UPS driver who swears he saw smoke coming out of the teleprompter), the new project will allow fans to talk directly to Chainsaw in real time. Not just send questions—but trigger responses. Personalized sarcasm, algorithmically enhanced confusion, and spontaneous enlightenment.
Mrs. Chicken said it best: “He’s finally built a way to argue with the world without leaving his chair.”
Launch date? Unknown.
Purpose? Classified.
Potential? Unlimited… and possibly illegal in three states.
Stay tuned. The test pattern just blinked.