Junior Chicken, a Freshman at Rosa Caesar JFK King High School in Paduka, Iowa really got in trouble today. He was being punished for expressing what he thought was a compliment to a fellow female student new to the school. The new girl was big for her age which is nothing new with girls and […]
Bay of Pigs Informant
Recently released FOIA documents have finally revealed the name of the informant that helped Castro be alerted and prepared for the Bay of Pigs invasion. His name was Bahía de Cochinos. This coincidence in name with the actual location of attack has clouded the investigation. However, Chainsaw Chicken learned from the death bed of Bahía […]
Post-Pres Plans For Obama
Information ‘leaked out’ this weekend that the lame-duck President, Barack Hussein Obama II, has agreed to lend his name and image to a Eastern European Septic Tank organization as a franchise service. “Business good” says Boris Chickenski. “Many people see truck, remember image on back end. They find me in phone book or business cards […]
KFC Derby-scratched
After the surprise of Niquil, the first place winner and the next two that placed and showed. It seems there were fowls committed by all three entries on the backstretch when the replay was reviewed. This means that the winner is ‘Fever Blister’ jockeyed by Poncho ‘Dynamite’ Chicken. This not only represents the first time […]
Cruz Belts Wife
As the picture shows and the title says, Cruz popped his wife while his attention was focused on getting a exiting hug from his long time friend Chainsaw Chicken, Rumor has it that Chainsaw was a close friend of Ted Cruz’s father and was with him on that faithful day in Dallas when President Kennedy […]
An All Gender Bathroom
Thanks to the LGBTQ movement and attention whores like him/her Bruce or Caitlyn Jenner (who to me is his own ‘movement’) The latest issue is the liberation of restrooms and the rights of this and that who can go into here or there and on and on… Without regard to the merit of this issue (or […]
Space Station Breach
‘Buzz’ (short for Buzzard) Chicken, nephew to my cousin. Glenn Chicken has been on the latest International Space Station orbiting Mars. He and another Astronaut from India named Curry Punjab have been on the space station for three years. Just the two of them. At least until the unfortunate accident last year when Curry electrocuted […]
Viral Internet Puzzle
Lately there has been a craze to find hidden objects in photos – much like a photo hunt puzzle. Do you remember the panda that started it all? You had to find the panda bear among the snowmen in this puzzle that went viral. There have been numerous puzzles like this popping up all over […]
‘Alaskan Bush People’
Say what? The famous “Alaskan Bush People” family dropped a shocking bombshell that has many wondering: Do the Browns have a secret daughter? Billy and Ami Brown caught viewers off-guard in the final seconds of the Season 4 preview. “30 years. We’ve heard nothing from her,” Billy said. “I’ve never forgotten her,” adds his wife, […]
CC to Replace Kelly Ripa
An Announcement that stunned the morning entertainment world was released today. Chainsaw Chicken witll be replacing Kelly Ripa on “Live”. The morning talk show was made famous by Regis Francis Xavier Philbin and Kathie Lee Gifford (1985-2000). A tantrum has been brewing between the current hosts, Kelly Ripa and Michael Strahan. Rather than giving into […]