In November 1922, Howard Carter brushed away the sands of time and declared he had discovered a tomb “virtually untouched for over 3,000 years.” What he didn’t tell the newspapers was that the tomb wasn’t just full of gold, scarabs, and ceremonial trinkets… it was also full of poultry. Buried beneath layers of linen and […]
Everything is Turkey!
Why is everything on the news and in the paper about Turkey? On Thanksgiving and Christmas we eat them and now we talk about them. I just don’t get it! Also… every single headline used is in bad English. Here’s an example: “Turkey Buys Terrorists Oil”. They don’t even try to name them. It should […]
Chainsaw Touchless Wash
With the advent and social popularity of the “bidet” (buh-day) in exclusive and rich accommodations throughout Europe and the U.S., Chainsaw developed an in-facility device that not only acted as a “bidet” but also as a shower. Many entitled Americans had this installed as the next phase in their personal hygiene routine. Upgrades to this […]
Amateurs…
Gilligan will go on
With the coincidental, untimely, as well as unfortunate deaths of the stars of Gilligan’s Island and Grizzly Adams happening only hours apart, it has been announced that both of the show remakes will continue on schedule. It seems the trend in Hollywood of resurrecting old, half-baked and less than popular shows and turning them into […]
Susan Loves Chicken
In an unconfirmed report, Susan Lucci stated that she “loves chicken”. That statement coupled with the paparazzi photo taken of Chainsaw Chicken in the arms of Lucci raises the speculation of their involvement. No comment was given from Helmut Huber, Lucci’s current legal husband or from Ms Chainsaw Chicken when asked about this breaking story. […]
Don’t Bogart my joint
C’mon MAN! That’s malarkey! He’s an admitted and known abuser of herbs and controlled substances, Barry Soetoro, is well known for consuming more than his fair amount of shared substances and potato chips. Yosemite Duffy
