Chainsaw Chicken (seen sitting at the desk behind) was the exclusive cigar merchant for the Clinton Administration. He lived two floors above Monica Lewinsky in the Watergate apartments and was the contact between Bill and Monica. It is rumored that Bill, Chainsaw and Monica met at his apartment for Ménage à trois (which is French […]
Easter Bunny Training
“Spring has sprung… The grass has riz… I wonder where the bunnies is?” According to Chainsaw Chicken, they are all in advance Easter production.”There are a ton of Easter baskets needing to be filled with bunny eggs”. Consider the concept of changing over the process of what bunnies traditionally drop in the yard to something […]
Scarce As Hen’s Teeth
A saying from the 18th century, it is somewhat accurate for the phylum of domesticated chicken, Gallus Gallus Domestica. However, there is a superior specie called Carnivorous Gallus Ubiquitous that did, in fact, have a large, serrated, toothed upper and lower beak. Scientist have long postulated that current inherent fears of certain creatures came from years […]
Remember Jr. High girls?
Think back to those Junior High or Middle School dances. The gym is decorated but is generally dark. The refreshment table is better illuminated with some bagged cookies laid out and a punch bowl with some small paper cups lined up. You and the guys are in small groups of a dozen or so talking […]
Viking Heritage
Okay… I admit it. I keep seeing that commercial about a guy looking at his ancestry. I decides to use my DNA to show where my family is from according to factors within the chromosomes and blood elements. So, I tried it and this is what I got for results; The first reply stated that […]
ISIS Takes a Brother
Seen on the Al-Ma-Nut-Job web site today is a photo of the leader of ISIS, Abba Zabba, holding the head of a local Christian Church Leader. His name was Bob Chicken. An official protest was filed at the Swiss council but fell on deaf ears. A new memorandum is being sent to Past Secretary of […]
Zodiac Re-Opened
The sleepy city of Tierra Del Fuego in Central California raised its head to see this new sketch of the infamous Zodiac Killer that terrorized their community years ago. This new drawing has emerged from one of the only surviving witnesses latest descriptions. Using a new mind numbing procedure, it allowed the witness to gather […]
Where’s Dirty Harry?
Chief Heather Thong or Fong (left), is the first SFPD female, lesbian chief of police. Harry (next) is the first trans species detective formally a duck to a chicken. Theresa Sparks (center), a former male, is president of the San Francisco Police Commission, CEO of a multi-million dollar sex toy retailer offering a new “Dirty […]
El Pollo Comancheros
The Chicken Feathers Gang headed by “El Wapo Pollo Pluma” (great grandfather to Chainsaw Chicken) was a notorious southern border mercenary gang in the 1870’s. In fact, the popular belief that the movie Magnificent Seven was based on the Japanese story of the Seven Samuri’s is a misconception to some degree. Both stories are based […]
Early Chicken Worship
In the middle-ages, the early family of Chainsaw Chicken had followers that would dawn outfits made of hand sewn burlap and dried gourds to imitate his look. Thus capturing in their minds the powers and presence of their hero. Seen here is a early tin-type of a Chainsaw Chicken Chorus group chanting during the half-time […]