It was a Turkey Invasion at my uncle’s home! What a slaughter! My uncle, George ‘Patton‘ Chicken knew how to deal with the intruders. With his home defense bat in the ready position you could hear him say famous lines from his namesake movie… “When you put your hand in a pile of goo that […]
Here’s Mud in Your Eye!
Profound Biden Wisdom
In a recent interview of the First Family, Chainsaw Chicken engaged the Biden’s from one of their multiple vacations in their Delaware home. As they responded to Chainsaw’s ‘softball’ questions, suddenly the world was given a lengthy explanation by the President that he believes could be the answer to many problems he sees in the […]
Treasure Found
What a good find! I have been looking for this 45 since 1963. It’s called “Chicken Feed” performed by ‘Bent Fabric and his piano’. Now you say, “who’s that???” Some will remember his hit “Alley Cat“, a tune that may be more familiar by hearing than knowing the title. ‘Chicken Feed’ is a record […]
Successful Dating
Dating can be very tricky now days. I see the very high frustration level on the other men’s faces, siting alone as I am in the back corner booth with my posse. While others worry about swipe right or left with online dating, I have learned what really works and keeps the ladies coming back, […]
Gordon Ramsay Questioned
The investigation into the series of missing members of Chainsaw Chicken’s family had a break though moment when Gordon Ramsay’s low rated show “Uncommon Dishes” showed a recipe for an authentic Chicken Pot Pie. “We’ve been loosing 8 to 12 young and vibrant chickens each evening with no clues as to what has been happening” […]
Ok… You Win
I was watching some old episodes of “Strange Love” the other night when all of a sudden I fell out of my lazy-boy. There was my crazy Uncle Sebastian flashing open his raincoat to a woman that looked like his widowed next-door neighbor lady, who was opening her coat, as well. Looks like a Mexican […]
She’s going threw them changes
Things are really changing around our coop. Mrs. Chicken has me alarmed. First she goes out and gets new hair-do. Then, she joins a Pilates class. Now, by themselves, these are fine and I welcome her desires to improve herself, although I always felt she was perfect just the way she was. Yet, more things […]
Bridges over foamy waters
I’m reminded of the time I was at a country dance bar with Mrs. Chicken’s niece. We were dancing it up for hours and drinking the suds to keep cool and hydrated. Now, I know what you are thinking but it is all ‘platonic‘… really. We had one room but we each had a separate […]
Do the Chicken Dance
Chicken Dance The “Chicken Dance”, also known as the Bird Song, the Birdie Song, the Bird Dance or the Chicken Song, is an oom-pah song; its associated fad dance is now a contemporary dance throughout the Western world. The song was composed by accordion player Werner Thomas from Davos, Switzerland, in the 1950s. […]