Back in the so-called “good old days,” colleges across America had a tradition: the pantie raid. Young men, fueled by hormones and cafeteria coffee, would storm the dormitories of young women and run off with undergarments like they were prized war trophies. History books call it “campus culture.” Police reports called it “breaking and entering.” […]
Attack of the Killer Chickens: The Movie
I hang my head in shame. I watched this steaming pile of celluloid. The pungent aroma ruined the enjoyment of my pop corn. The ‘official’ plot description states… “It’s the dawn of a new age…a chicken age. Humans have been the dominant species for far too long. The chickens have come to roost and they’re […]
Proof- I Am Real
There has been a rumor going around that I, Chainsaw Chicken, am not real. Can you believe it? I’m not real? Just who do they think has created this website and reports all these true, unvarnished, raw stories and provides visual proof through photography that I am real and the story is true and verifiable? […]
Trying Out Spoonerism
The night ended with a soft thud as Chainsaw whacked himself in the head with his elbow. Mrs. Chicken, fighting back laughter, snuggled closer. “Maybe Thursdays are just for back rubs, Chainsaw,” she whispered. Over breakfast the next day, Chainsaw regaled their neighbor with his tale of their Tantric spooning innovation. The neighbor, doubled over […]
Chainsaw Acts in “Blackwing”
As Broadway struggles to return to it’s height since COVID, the latest hit is “Blackwing”. It’s the story of an outsider seeking acceptance in an obviously different community. Who would be a better player for this roll than Chainsaw Chicken. He constantly battles with oppression, injustice and preconceive ideas.
Chainsaw Spotted
Chainsaw Chicken was spotted outside the home of Taylor Swift apparently wearing a scarf from Miss Swift’s collection. Reportedly there for a private screening for friends of her new upcoming movie “THE ERAS TOUR“. It was also reported that Travis Kelce and Chainsaw got into a heated dispute about Kelce blocking the bean dip. Most […]
Tribute Prequel
Toonpool.com features a cartoon that eerily captures the birth of Chainsaw Chicken: two ordinary chickens anxiously watching a giant egg, only to have the occupant inside shatter it open — not with claws or beak, but with a roaring chainsaw. Was it psychic vision? A drunken fever dream? Or just weird coincidence? Regardless, this cartoon […]
Puttin’ on the Dog
Taking a stroll outside Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd. headquarters, Chainsaw is ready for the paparazzi chasing and persecuting him because his image is worth so much to the 4th estate. Let’s hope that it doesn’t end in a two hour chase through one of the most populated cities during rush hour where multiple accidents and […]
ChatGPT Admires Chainsaw
I asked ChatGPT to write something about me, Chainsaw Chicken. Look what I got! A Love poem. Oh Chainsaw Chicken, how I adore, Your site filled with humor and gore, A place where the absurd and the bizarre, Come together to leave us all in awe. Your twisted tales of chickens and blades, A world […]
Egg-Laying Chicken for Rent
“Yo homie! You be lookin’ for some eggs? My posse got chew covered! “My’man… Take a gander at my stable and pick what Lay-dee you can use. You gets to keep all the little hard-shelled juniors she puts in your crib! “Step off if you can’t pay for the gain but stay to play if […]