“The testing is complete and the results are in” said CNN’s Anderson Cooper on his evening news program. “Science claims that we can now see 100% of your brain, Mr. Chicken:, he continued. “That’s what they tell me” replied Chainsaw. “It’s all there, not like others that only use 60% of their brains,. I use […]
Schedule Changed
OFFICIAL NOTICE: It appears that we will not be able to honor tickets purchased for the next show in the Nevada desert. However, if you are willing to hold on to your reservations, it appears that the next opportunity to attend this explosive show will be after January 20th of 2021. These events appear to […]
Covid in Obamaville
So far, like with everyone, it’s been a year, for sure! First we had the results of the Obama administration with all the unemployment and over taxation causing this delightful town to rename itself from Sunnyville to Obamaville. Then this covid crap has us on our final legs. No businesses here qualified for any Federal […]
Lethal Chicken Gun
Scientists at NASA built a gun specifically to launch standard 4 pound dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields. British engineers heard about the […]
Project Bluebook ’61
Date: Sept. 17, 1961 Location: Van Dyke Turnpike area, Troy, OH Incident Report: Rooster child named Chainsaw Chicken, age 5, was reported to be missing for 4 hours on this date. When finally discovered, he had no explanation at all as to where he had been except to say he saw a ‘bright light’ and […]
Easter Island Discovery
After finally obtaining permission from the government of Peru, Bumgardener Chicken started using microwave technology to search Easter Island for more Moai heads carved by the Rapa Nui. Within a few days an entire row of Moai heads where found under the ruins of a past culture. These carvings dated back farther than the typical […]
Cave Drawings Discovered
An international team of anthropologist and learned professionals were summoned to a small cavern near a hill outside the eastern boarder of France. They are there to examine a cave that has been unearthed. Seen in the cryptograms are wild animals of the day, hunted for food. There are other drawings of humans performing daily […]
New Test For Sanity
Finally, there is a ‘fool-proof’ test for your mental sanity and stability. This test was developed by Prof. Poppycock Chicken to instantly diagnose the sanity and psychosis someone may be suffering from. Start by gazing at the the stationary Blue/Yellow orbs in the rows. If they are not moving, then you are okay and have […]
Where’s Dirty Harry?
Chief Heather Thong or Fong (left), is the first SFPD female, lesbian chief of police. Harry (next) is the first trans species detective formally a duck to a chicken. Theresa Sparks (center), a former male, is president of the San Francisco Police Commission, CEO of a multi-million dollar sex toy retailer offering a new “Dirty […]
The TIGHT Jacket
At one point in Chainsaw Chickens past, he suffered from bi-polar/dis-associative/anti-social/psychotic/borderline/OCD phobia. He is seen here under armed guard, in a straight jacket within a padded cell and under chemical castration. Cranial-Rectal Inversion