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The Tribe Has Spoken

The Tribe Has Spoken

Were you watching? It was the first episode of Survivor recently. It was like the 87th season or something. At least this time they didn’t drag out the same old tired winners from the past to recycle them through the grinder for another season of drama, strategy, lying, backstabbing and out-n-out greed. Seems like the […]

Let’s go Brandon

Let’s go Brandon

Last week, my cousin Brandon Chicken was at the Boston College vs Clemson game. Just like what is happening all over the country at football, baseball, soccer (nee football), NASCAR races, school board meetings..(well, maybe not school board meeting.. yet). The crowd, usually in outdoor settings spontaneously begin to chant “Let’s go Brandon”. But is […]

New Emoji

New Emoji

Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd had their emoji submitted and then rejected. This was the third time. Now it took a legal suit to get Apple, Inc to finally agree to accept this submission. What changed their minds? It was simple. Chainsaw obtained a copy of the submission request put forth by the socialist agency that […]

I broke Facebook

I broke Facebook

Yup, it was me. I broke Facebook. Don’t believe what the press releases are saying or the speculations of all the talking heads on TV. It was me. I got so tired of so many of my posts not actually being visible to the thousands of followers that I have, I did it. What did […]

Hair sniffing isn’t so bad

Hair sniffing isn’t so bad

For the last several years we’ve all been hearing about certain executives that we see on the news each night being accused of hair sniffing young women. I must admit, at first it did not sound appealing to me at all. Running around sniffing the hair of pre-teen and teens with some form of delight. […]

The Girls Showers

The Girls Showers

With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]

Get your FAKE chicken!

Get your FAKE chicken!

Fake Chicken? Yes… Chicken made from plant protein. MMmm mm Good! It’s so good, Chainsaw has dedicated all his free time to promote the alternative of using fake chicken rather than slaughtering his family members. ” We have to do something about the systematic extermination of all those that look like me. Next we have […]

First Electric Cargo Ship

First Electric Cargo Ship

News arrived that great Uncle Henry Morgan Chicken has been selected to skipper the first, all electric cargo ship. When asked about this privilege, Captain Henry simply said “Arrrrrr, Supposed to be a great honorrrrr!” his Nantucket accent in full display. The interview continued, “So how long have you been a ships captain? Henry answered […]