Yup, it was me. I broke Facebook. Don’t believe what the press releases are saying or the speculations of all the talking heads on TV. It was me. I got so tired of so many of my posts not actually being visible to the thousands of followers that I have, I did it. What did […]
Hair sniffing isn’t so bad
For the last several years we’ve all been hearing about certain executives that we see on the news each night being accused of hair sniffing young women. I must admit, at first it did not sound appealing to me at all. Running around sniffing the hair of pre-teen and teens with some form of delight. […]
The Girls Showers
With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]
Get your FAKE chicken!
Fake Chicken? Yes… Chicken made from plant protein. MMmm mm Good! It’s so good, Chainsaw has dedicated all his free time to promote the alternative of using fake chicken rather than slaughtering his family members. ” We have to do something about the systematic extermination of all those that look like me. Next we have […]
First Electric Cargo Ship
News arrived that great Uncle Henry Morgan Chicken has been selected to skipper the first, all electric cargo ship. When asked about this privilege, Captain Henry simply said “Arrrrrr, Supposed to be a great honorrrrr!” his Nantucket accent in full display. The interview continued, “So how long have you been a ships captain? Henry answered […]
New “Woke Wash”
Have you noticed a sudden decrease in your social woke-ism? Have others noticed your lack of being sufficiently woke, as well? Do you know someone, such as your spouse, parent or neighbor that are secretly conservatives or even members of that evil political party here in the USA, that really needs to be ‘immersed’ in […]
Successful Dating
Dating can be very tricky now days. I see the very high frustration level on the other men’s faces, siting alone as I am in the back corner booth with my posse. While others worry about swipe right or left with online dating, I have learned what really works and keeps the ladies coming back, […]
She’s going threw them changes
Things are really changing around our coop. Mrs. Chicken has me alarmed. First she goes out and gets new hair-do. Then, she joins a Pilates class. Now, by themselves, these are fine and I welcome her desires to improve herself, although I always felt she was perfect just the way she was. Yet, more things […]
I’m Now on a Stamp
News arrived today that the country called “the United Democracy of Kyrgyzstan” has agreed to offer a commemorative stamp in my honor. What an honor! The way it happened is like this. One of my cousins is a big time smuggler. He was in Kyrgyzstan picking up a pocket full of giant-sized topaz jewels ftom […]
What’s Coming Down
“Look up to see what’s coming down”. A famous expression put to music by Carlos Santana in 1972. Nearly 50 years later, let’s ask the same question. “What’s coming down?” Gasoline? No… Taxes? Oh no… Food? Cost of Living? Home values? Car prices? UFO sightings? Hahahaha.. You’re kidding, right? Okay, Okay… Look, It’s like this, […]