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Chicken Scratch

Chicken Scratch

Chainsaw has submitted his autobiography for publication. We have an excerpt from the coming Best Seller called “Chicken Scratch”     Eddie’s Security    

Gordon Ramsay Questioned

Gordon Ramsay Questioned

The investigation into the series of missing members of Chainsaw Chicken’s family had a break though moment when Gordon Ramsay’s low rated show “Uncommon Dishes” showed a recipe for an authentic Chicken Pot Pie. “We’ve been loosing 8 to 12 young and vibrant chickens each evening with no clues as to what has been happening” […]

Spies Like Us

Spies Like Us

With the fall of Afghanistan and the debacle of  Hamid Karzai International Airport in Kabul, Chainsaw Chicken has been reactivated and sent in as a deep undercover spy. His mission? To get in tight with the leadership of the Taliban network to be the eyes and ears of the ‘over the horizon‘ capabilities the Washington […]

Ok… You Win

Ok… You Win

I was watching some old episodes of “Strange Love” the other night when all of a sudden I fell out of my lazy-boy. There was my crazy Uncle Sebastian flashing open his raincoat to a woman that looked like his widowed next-door neighbor lady, who was opening her coat, as well. Looks like a Mexican […]

Plans for Biden Library

Plans for Biden Library

The final plans for the Biden Presidential Library were selected today. The winner of the contract went to the Nation-wide Architectural firm of ‘Oliver, William and Murphy’, headquartered in Talahoochie, Delaware. “We have a few obstacles to overcome”, outlined the firms President, Mr. Oliver. “First, is with the lack of availability to obtain the needed […]

“Chicken Hawk” captured

“Chicken Hawk” captured

The assassin-spy known as “Carlos the Chicken Hawk” has finally been captured. He was visiting some friends through the fence at the Foster Farms retention area where he was apprehended. He initially identifying himself a someone name Bruce Biden, a close cousin to President Biden. It was later learned that he was actually Carlos Chicken. […]

Help Find Huey

Help Find Huey

With tears in her eyes, Krissy Bobkins hangs another poster about her missing pet, Huey, her pet chicken. “He’s been gone for days now” she muttered through a tissue drying her eyes. “I swear, I miss him so much, it’s seems like I hear him sometimes, saying desperate words  like “Help”, “I can’t breathe” and […]

I’m Now on a Stamp

I’m Now on a Stamp

News arrived today that the country called “the United Democracy of Kyrgyzstan” has agreed to offer a commemorative stamp in my honor. What an honor! The way it happened is like this. One of my cousins is a big time smuggler. He was in Kyrgyzstan picking up a pocket full of giant-sized topaz jewels ftom […]