“Hey guys! What new?” asked Chainsaw at his weekly coffee meeting with Ronald McDonald and Sasquatch. Sas (what friends call Sasquatch) and RonnieMac (Ronald McDonald) turned to watch Chainsaw lower his posterior on to the bench slowly with a grown, just as seen in that classic Progressive Insurance commercial about turning into your parents. “You […]
Let’s go Brandon
Last week, my cousin Brandon Chicken was at the Boston College vs Clemson game. Just like what is happening all over the country at football, baseball, soccer (nee football), NASCAR races, school board meetings..(well, maybe not school board meeting.. yet). The crowd, usually in outdoor settings spontaneously begin to chant “Let’s go Brandon”. But is […]
Available for Kindle
A flash from the past. Yes, my first book offered back in 2016 is available on Kindle. Take a look on Amazon and you will see this 109 page download of thoughts and stories with photos, just like you see on the web site.
Biden Remote Controller
The pool camera feed panned left momentarily and a stunning image was seen by the people still watching President Biden’s speech. It was the infamous Darth Chicken, the string puller in the White House. The Biden Remote Controller. “Shitzen!” shouted Darth Chicken using his new Biden Remote Controller. “Put your hand down, Joe”…. Darth continued […]
Turkey Invasion
It was a Turkey Invasion at my uncle’s home! What a slaughter! My uncle, George ‘Patton‘ Chicken knew how to deal with the intruders. With his home defense bat in the ready position you could hear him say famous lines from his namesake movie… “When you put your hand in a pile of goo that […]
New Emoji
Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd had their emoji submitted and then rejected. This was the third time. Now it took a legal suit to get Apple, Inc to finally agree to accept this submission. What changed their minds? It was simple. Chainsaw obtained a copy of the submission request put forth by the socialist agency that […]
Here’s Mud in Your Eye!
I broke Facebook
Yup, it was me. I broke Facebook. Don’t believe what the press releases are saying or the speculations of all the talking heads on TV. It was me. I got so tired of so many of my posts not actually being visible to the thousands of followers that I have, I did it. What did […]
The Mrs. had a tough night
I’m speaking to the husbands in this editorial. Ever had the li’l lady tell you she was going to go out for a drink or two with friends from work? One of the ‘girls’ is going threw some tough times Oh yes… Sounds so innocent, doesn’t it? Her and a couple of female friends from […]
Profound Biden Wisdom
In a recent interview of the First Family, Chainsaw Chicken engaged the Biden’s from one of their multiple vacations in their Delaware home. As they responded to Chainsaw’s ‘softball’ questions, suddenly the world was given a lengthy explanation by the President that he believes could be the answer to many problems he sees in the […]
A.O.C. Stole Her Idea!
It was so embarrassing for Mrs. Chicken. She was really trying to make a very important point when she attended the Gala at the Met in New York.. This was s message to everyone by noticing her dress. Maybe even some press. She wanted to let people know that vegetarians have other options rather than […]
Hair sniffing isn’t so bad
For the last several years we’ve all been hearing about certain executives that we see on the news each night being accused of hair sniffing young women. I must admit, at first it did not sound appealing to me at all. Running around sniffing the hair of pre-teen and teens with some form of delight. […]
Tribute Toy
If you remember Black and White television, the Beatles visiting New York City or ‘Leave it to Beaver’ on TV, you probably remember the Dipping Bird. Now, back by popular demand, Ronco with K-tel records and Chainsaw Chicken International, Ltd is offering a commemorative tribute replica for sale. Granted, we’ve made a few changes. Most […]
The Girls Showers
With a noticeable tremble in his hands and his voice, Chainsaw swallowed hard and dabbed the sweat beads on his brow. “This….. is…. the…the… girls showers!” He paused, moving around, shifting his weight from one foot to another…. “This was sacred ground when I was in school. It was literally ‘no mans land’ to us […]
Wuhan Lab Discovery
Guest scientist Fauci Chicken has been working non-stop for months at the Wuhan Labs, in order to try to avoid the similarities of the issues with Merek’s Disease and Covid-19. Here is what Wikipediphile says about Merek’s Disease in chickens: (look for yourself under ‘Prevention’ at the link below) “Because vaccination does not prevent infection […]
Chicken who?
“Hello there! How ya doing? Are your enjoying this county fair?” Chainsaw asked as he worked his way through the poultry exhibits. No answer came from the red chicken he was addressing. “I’m a sponsor of this area of the exhibit. That’s my logo behind you and you can see my web site address plastered […]
Smiling Assassin
Tragedy reared it’s ugly head in our home this week. When Mrs. Chicken and I returned from the gala at the Met, we found Rodney, our neighbor. He likes, ahhh…(pause) ‘liked’ to dress as if he was a member of our family. He was watching the summer finale of America’s Got Talent at our place […]
Machu Picchu Lawn Service
Isn’t Machu Picchu beautiful? The stone and grass make such a pleasing image. But you might be asking, “Grass? At 8,000 feet above sea-level? How curious. That must take a real professional yard service to keep it all looking so neat and trimmed with such color”. Let me introduce to you how these patches of […]
Biden Adjustments
Darth Chicken has returned to the Oval Office to make some adjustments and fine tuning. “Just a small adjustment with this tiny dial… THERE! Now! That should shorten the lag time between questions and answers… Okay, now for the sleepiness during the day. I am turning up the alertness throttle stop. Almost there… ahhhh…DONE! Now…I […]
Get your FAKE chicken!
Fake Chicken? Yes… Chicken made from plant protein. MMmm mm Good! It’s so good, Chainsaw has dedicated all his free time to promote the alternative of using fake chicken rather than slaughtering his family members. ” We have to do something about the systematic extermination of all those that look like me. Next we have […]