The U.S. Navy and Chainsaw Chicken have reached a licensing agreement to use Chainsaw’s likeness in their new emblem and logo called ‘Chaingun Chicken’ for the Navy’s new fast attack boats that also qualify for the Green New Deal specifications. The Navy came to Chainsaw because of his popular image involves strength and ability as […]
Chicken-dactyl Called Foo
Tragedy struck the cold case team attempting to reconstruct the 1961 disappearance of Michael Rockefeller. He was the fifth child of Nelson Rockefeller and one of the heirs to the Rockefeller dynasty. All this mystery centered around Papua, New Guinea. Michael was ostensibly going to study the Asmat tribe, because they were some of the […]
Instruction Book
Has this ever happened to you? You are in a casual meeting with other friends or co-works, and they begin to use slang words and expressions you simply do not understand. What do you do? Do you just nod in acceptance to what they are expressing? Do you feel that you want to add to […]
Black light treatment
Several years ago it was thought that exposing the young to black light rays would ease their transition with the painful development of their pin feathers. Years later, it became more obvious that all the black light did was allow them to develop fuller, thicker, more glorious feathers but did not aid in the pin […]
Seminary Class 2021
This years graduating class from the exclusive Order of the Dark Priests filed out to be seen for the first time in their exquisite robes. Each of these emerging priests have been trained in the book of Enoch and other dark arts. Rasputin Chicken was the Salutatorian of the class while Giuseppe Alister was the […]
Creation of Dinochick
“Michael Crichton got it all wrong, I mean way wrong!” Stated Biologist Dr. Jockkim Pollo, director of Bio Research at Chainsaw Chicken International, LTD. “I mean really? Frog DNA? You need to use CHICKEN DNA”. He says this based on the latest theory that dinosaurs are suggested to be closer to birds rather than amphibians […]
Nessy alive and well
Finally I have proof that the Lock Ness Monster, called affectionately ‘Nessy’, is alive and well and gives one heck of a ride. Last week, when I was doing my book tour in Scotland, I took a detour to the ‘Lock’ and dawned my wet suit. I took off swimming with the faint hope of […]
Cowabunga Dude!
“Oh righteous, my brothers!” could be heard by La Jolla Chicken as he finished his set in the 1951 Long Board surfing competition off the sands of Manhattan Beach, California. “Did you feel that curl? Totally Tubular” he continued, “Cowabunga”. But where did the term cowabunga come from? Now you know. Some give credit for […]
Solway Firth Solved
This famous photograph referred to as ‘Solway Firth Spaceman‘ is classified as one of the strangest, unsolved mysteries ever photographed. In 1964, in Solway Firth, England, a father took a nice photo of his daughter enjoying a picnic in a field. Just the two of them. They were alone. But when the film was developed, […]
Chainsaw Chicken Area
No, it’s not an autonomous zone like CHAZ or George Floyd Square. It’s a popularized expression of a community awareness. Groups who mutually gather with a common joy of a single thought or concept. But they don’t block others from entering or exposing those less aware to the idea. All skin colors, ethnicity, races, creeds, […]
Our Glorious Leader
Excitement is at a fevered pitch around the ‘Holy Communal Center’ as the 50 chosen wives ready themselves for the largest marriage ever seen in the mountains of Nevada at the ‘Church of the Anointed Chicken’ . Each of these brides have had private interviews with Our Glorious Leader in the past weeks. They have […]
Co-ed Cooing
As can be seen in this historic 1960’s photo taken on a University campus, it shows the disturbing and unhealthy practice of what some label as ‘heavy petting’. All caused by the evils of rock and roll. As the transistor radio held by Brian ‘Beach Boy’ Chicken lures an unaware female with his demon music, […]
Early Color Chicken
For you spring chickens out there, the idea of having nothing but black and white TV and having 3 channels to choose from, seems to be an ultimate torture, but years ago, at the time, we thought it was pretty great to have any entertainment. Personally, I was blessed with an extra channel so we […]
Pioneer Leghorn
Ah yes, some say he’s the original American Chicken favorite. Foghorn Leghorn. A pioneer for poultry humor. Before Foghorn, the only chicken-based humor was when a vaudevillian mesmerizer would control someone from the audience and give them a hypnotic suggestion causing them to cluck and flap their wings like a chicken every time they hear […]
Get in, Tyrone!
Did I ever tell about the time I rescued Tyrone Power from an over-aggressively enthusiastic fan? There I was, idling outside the Brown Derby in Beverly Hills. I had just finished my lunch with Johnny Weissmuller and his 3rd wife, Allene. I was giving Johnny some coaching advice on how to break into television since […]
Chicken in Every Pot?
Here we go again! A chicken in every pot? I liken that tired and fruitless trope to more to the analogy of the ‘frog in a pot of boiling water‘. Are you familiar with it? Some say it is one of Eshops Fables, but that is not true. If a frog is placed in a […]
An Easter Chicken
We all know that the reality of rabbits and bunnies laying eggs for Easter is simply not true. A basic biology class will inform you that rabbits and bunnies are mammals and with that, they don’t lay eggs. If they could and still bunnies or rabbits, they would be called Trans species or Otherkin. Here […]
ROKU Chicken
With the tread of the recognition of the superiority of chickens in general, and Chainsaw Chicken specifically, Roku has dedicated a series on their channel about this very subject. Roku is a company that makes media-streaming devices. The name means “six” in Japanese because Roku is the sixth company launched by its founder, Anthony Wood. […]
This one scares me!
Every time I see this guy, I get the chills. You see it too, right? Oh, the shivers run up my spine. It keeps me awake thinking about running into him somewhere. You feel it too, right? They said his name was Owlman and he was born this way. I think the scary part is […]
Stanley was always a nut!
Stanley Chicken was such a comedic child. Always going for the joke, the punchline. Here he is with his Auntie Griselda during a wedding of her daughter to some ‘turkey’ that lasted only a few years. It was a big shift in the family over the wedding. But leave it to Stanley, he tried any […]